Monday, January 31, 2005
Two interesting theme-related events in the past couple of days.
Purely in the interest of gathering information and practicing (why are you looking at me like that? It's true) I stopped by a strip club this weekend on a slow Sunday afternoon. I wanted to find out more about this whole "eye contact" thing that sort of took me by complete surprise last week.
I figured that if I could maintain steady eye contact with naked women, I'd be really ahead of the game. Either that, or the dancers would think I was gay. At any rate, I would find out something and have some fun doing it.
And the results were pretty much spectacular. Dancers (and quite possibly women in general) understand eye contact; it's partly a dominance thing, partly a way of communicating a comfort level that most men don't carry with them normally (let alone around the aforementioned naked women). I even got called over to help this one girl get dressed, tying up her halter-top-type dress. I let her know that this was a first for me and that she should probably be tipping me.
I did find that it's fun to vary my expression. I don't have to keep a straight face. I had fun winking, smirking, popping my eyes out of my head. There was definite tension build up...
There was one girl with whom I found it difficult to maintain eye contact. Even so, she seemed to recognize my attempt and went from being distant and expressionless to warming up, laughing and joking with me, tossing her hair around and playing peek-a-boo. She turned out to be very funny and smart.
And I only spent an hour there...
Then, this afternoon, while at work, I was getting in the elevator going up to my office and I heard a voice cry out "Hold that elevator!" I did, and this blonde woman bolted in. She must have been running to catch it; she was out of breath and leaned against the opposite wall (side note: have you ever noticed that people tend to distribute themselves proportionately in an elevator? At least when they're strangers. People who know each other will clump together but make space for strangers. Watch for it sometime. Or, if you're feeling devilish, purposely don't and see how people react. It's fun) and when I looked at her, I blurted out, "I know you!"
She was a stripper that I knew from a long, long time ago, ten years or more. Um, awkward moment. I don't know what the etiquette is for acknowledging "exotic entertainers" when they're not in the club and not on the stage. I'm pretty sure I shouldn't call her by her stage name if other folks are around... It's a situation that calls for caution.
She looked at me, and smiled a bit, nodded her head... "Yeah, you look familiar to me, too."
I was going to look for a wedding ring, but got distracted by her bus pass, hanging from her backpack about mid-chest level. It was marked with an "H" -- which in Portland means it's an "Honored Citizen" pass for the elderly or disabled. I was confuzzled.
She had hit a floor between the ground floor and mine. I looked at her again and said, "You work in the building?"
"Yes!" she said brightly.
"Me, too!" I said. "For the county?"
"Yes!" she said again.
"Me, too!" I said. And by that time the elevator had reached her floor and she scampered off.
Now I'm torn. I was a regular customer of hers, but not, in any sense of the word, intimate with her. I did know her real name, which I only vaguely recall now, but wasn't ever what I would consider a "friend" beyond being an ATM that dispensed cash whenever she took off her clothes. And, if she does in fact work for the county she might not want her past career widely known. All reasons for me to just let it go and not try to look her up.
Still, it would be interesting to meet her for lunch and find out what happened in the intervening years. Also, what the hell is up with that "H" bus pass?
Sunday, January 30, 2005
Drowning is a powerful metaphor. Humans seem to have an affinity for water even though we are not, by nature, aquatic (crackpot evolutionary theories aside). Most settlements are near running water, supposedly for practical reasons of transport or hydration, but, face it, we love to play in the water. We adore the sound of rushing water. We love the glint of sunlight on waves and ripples. We bathe, sometimes for the simple joy of feeling wet all over.
So when someone tells you that they are drowning, it stirs a strong response, doesn't it? Even if it's a metaphor, like they are drowning in work, or drowning in sorrow, It immediately brings a superposition of images and concepts, calls to mind feelings of sinking, of suffocation, of thrashing about, feeling resistance but unable to grab anything solid or secure. The colors that spring to mind are deceptive and therefore ironic: instead of the universal danger signal of warm firey reds or oranges, it's cool blues and greens, peaceful, calming, encouraging relaxation and acceptance even as life escapes from the body in silver bubbles of air and the lungs fill with cold and possibly salty liquid.
Sinking, not rising. We associate rising with flying, and with heaven, and with birds and freedom. But sinking is normally connected to the earth, to both cold clay and the burning pain of hell. A sink is where we empty out containers, wash our hands of dirt and filth. A sink's center is a drain, where the flow takes what is deposited and whisks it away. We sink money into a project, usually a bad or failed project that has become a colossal waste of time. Likewise, we sink into the sea, drowning amidst water, the stuff of life.
If someone is drowning, it requires a specific set of skills or tools to rescue them. Rescue is not something everyone can attempt. Despite our universal love of playing in water, not everyone can swim; and not everyone can swim strongly enough to support both themselves and a panicked friend. We have special jobs for those who have trained for just such a rescue, and because of their training and the specialized, romantic nature of their occupations, they seem to be among the most beautiful people around. Lifeguards, we call them, their sole purpose that of rescue, a specific kind of rescue that only someone who has overestimated their own abilities requires.
If someone is drowning but a heroic trained guardian of life is not available and our own skills are insufficient to provide rescue by ourselves, sometimes we can avail ourselves of the tools of rescue. Almost every tool associated with drowning rescue has life as it's prefix. Life preserver, lifeline, life jacket. Here, often, we find the angry reds and oranges again inverted in meaning, becoming life-giving, life restoring. We toss out the tools, but the drowning victim must still reach out and take what is offered and make use of it, before it all balances again and the would-be rescuer and the would-rather-not-be-drowner can again meet in the middle, balance restored.
Saturday, January 29, 2005
I woke up around 7:30 AM this morning, couldn't get back to sleep but didn't want to be up early on a dark rainy Saturday morning. I puttered around, answered some email, fed Smacky and gave him his medicine, put some laundry in... started feeling sleepy again, went back to bed.
Then I realized that I would need some calories for the run later, since I had planned on running at some point today, and thought I should get up and eat something. I figured I'd nap for another hour or two. I thought it was smart to do that; I've read in Runner's World that having 200-300 calories before a tough run is a good thing. Of course, they're talking about running marathons, so I'm not sure it applies, but I did it anyway. Drank a couple of glasses of water, too, to hydrate. Or something.
Best part was waking up a couple of hours later, face down and sprawled in bed, with Smacky sprawled across the back of my head and neck, keeping my ears warm. What a good kitten. It was actually his snoring that woke me; the strange wheezy purr infiltrated my dreams. I had to move carefully because I was afraid if I moved too quickly he would startle and claw me. Funny cat.
And, as a result of the eating and drinking, and maybe the extra sleep, I ran very well today. I tried not to notice how fast I was going, but it's nearly impossible not to notice when running on the treadmill (too cold and rainy to run outside). I covered 3.1 miles in 30:14, or just a shade over a 9:45 pace. May not seem fast to other runners, but considering how lousy I've been doing this winter I'm pretty pleased with my pace and time. It means that whatever has afflicted me is going away, and I can get back to improving again.
Oddly enough, my legs were stiff for almost the first two miles. Didn't seem like I could really loosen up until the final 3/4 or 1/2 mile. I warmed up and stretched beforehand.
I have 4 Gmail accounts to give away. They're not doing me much good.
One per person to the next 4 people to reply to this post or contact me...
I'll need your name and a valid email address.
My combined Federal and State income tax refunds will cover the cost of an iPod Shuffle and a Mac Mini. Whoo-hoo!
...and even as I type this, they've been ordered. I'm getting the 1 GB Shuffle, and the faster Mac Mini. I paid Apple to upgrade to the SuperDrive (DVD-burner) and double the standard memory (for a total of 512 MB of RAM). Don't need wireless and I've got a Bluetooth adapter for the Mini.
Also ponied up the $79 for Apple's new iWork suite (can you call two programs a "suite"? More like a "bundle"), mainly for Pages. From the reviews I've seen, Pages is more like a page-layout program like Adobe's InDesign, than it is a word-processor. Coolio.
Sadly, the Apple Store is quoting a ship time of "3-4 weeks" for the two hardware items. I'm likely to get the actual refund (thanks to the miracle of electronic deposit) before the items that it's paying for show up. Ain't that a stinker?
At least I'll have the iPod Shuffle in time for the Shamrock Run in mid-March. If there's no delays, at any rate.
Friday* Night** Cat Blogging!
click image for larger version
...and here's some more!
* ...or "Saturday"
** ...or "Morning"
Thursday, January 27, 2005
Walking around downtown, I see so many people with iPods that it isn't funny. At lunchtime, with the sidewalks crowded with lunchtime folk lunching on their lunchtime, I see at least one or two of the tell-tale white earbuds snaking out of a backpack or pocket.
Most of these people wear all black. Just sayin'. I wonder if it's because black is cool, or because of the commercials?
Many of these people have a cool scarf of some kind. Also, just sayin'.
I did, however, see this one guy the other day (neither wearing black nor did he have a cool scarf) with the thin white cables snaking out of his hand. It's so easy to spot people, they stand out. It's not like I'm looking for them or anything. Really.
At any rate, as he approached, I could see that the white cables plugged into a cheap, blue-and-silver portable CD player.
Hmmm. What do you call it when someone poses as a poseur?
So, last night, I was taking the bus home, feeling a little, y'know, anti-social, nose buried in my book ("All The President's Men" -- awesome. I will post a review over at Geeks Against Bush when I'm finished), sitting near the back of the bus...
The bus stopped in front of Portland State, and this brunette got on and sat across from me. I can't judge age well but she seemed like she was in her late 20s early 30s, maybe? She was wearing these faded old jeans, and, well... wow. I noticed a picture badge hanging from her backpack that was from the university -- but I couldn't tell, in my quick glance, if she was a student or faculty. Seemed more student-ish.
I'm sitting on one of the sideways chairs, and she's sitting across the aisle facing towards the front of the bus.
She's sitting there, and I'm looking at her, and she's looking around, and... frankly, I don't know why she turned to look, but she did it slowly up to a point and then turned quickly to see if I was looking at her. I was. And, again, like the last time, I held her gaze, not smiling, just a neutral gaze straight into her eyes.
...which were a rich dark brown, by the way.
She holds the look for just the briefest of seconds, and when it becomes apparent that I'm not looking away, nor am I embarassed, she looks down and away and gives this very coy, but also very sexy smile.
She has just the slightest blush, also. I smile, very subtly, back, and then return to reading my book.
When this happens, there's a shock to my system, that's hard to describe. But my mind goes into overdrive, fighting with myself as to what to do next.
Sadly, the part of my brain that says, "Do nothing; danger here!" won. :(
But for the rest of the bus ride, I can see her in my peripheral vision, over the top of my book, once or twice, look back in my direction.
When she got off the bus, she deliberately walked past the bus, and almost literally glared at me through the window, as if she was so disappointed that I hadn't followed up on my direct stare.
It was... fascinating, actually. It made me recall another time from the night before. Another cute brunette, she was on the phone, I smiled at her and then sat right behind her. And after she got off the phone, she kept sneaking glances at me behind her.
This is the revelation I had, and it seems kind of basic and a stoopid thing for me to only now to be learning, after forty years... but here it is:
Some girls want to be approached.
Weird, huh?
It's a completely new concept in my experience... but it seems to be happening a lot lately.
Wednesday, January 26, 2005
I've had a request that I'm asking for input on:
Over on the right I have my "Picture of the Week".
I prefer to have it simply be a link to my picture gallery. But someone asked if it could be a link to the larger version of the picture.
Which would folks prefer?
The moon last night looked like it was melting in space, so bright and silver-gray but through the high thin clouds that appeared to be steam streaming from it...
Tuesday, January 25, 2005
While scanning my web logs, which are not the same thing as weblogs; what I was scanning was the logs associated with my web host... er, OK, at any rate...
I found a site that includes me in their links (or "blog roll", which is another term for links or bookmarks posted online of other blogs; damn, the terminology is really getting out of hand, huh?)
...er, where was I? Oh, right: The Modulator has a page of the most complete blog links I've seen in a while. And, way down under the heading "Visual Arts" (which surprises the heck outta me, since I think of myself as a writer) is "Lunar Obverse"!
Coolio!
The folk at The Modulator also archive any and all "Friday Night Cat Blogging" (also dog, spider, etc., etc.), which I've learned is a long-standing tradition amongst bloggers. Little did I know...
Other things I've learned from reading the logs is that someone, somewhere, used the Belgian Google to search for something on my page. Twice! Yeah, baby! Bring on the Belgians!
I spotted her -- well, to be honest, I spotted her even before I stepped on to the bus. As it was pulling up I saw her face through the window. Black straight hair, half over her face, Veronica Lake style, Hispanic features, petite, almond-shaped green (I swear!) eyes...
At any rate, as luck would have it, I ended up standing next to her; she was sitting in the front part of the bus, facing sideways, her hands folded over a spiral notebook, her legs in pinstripe slacks and crossed. She wore white high heels, and the toes were sharply pointed. Honestly, to me, the shoes looked a little ridiculous. I'm sure, to a girl, they had some other meaning.
I didn't pay much attention to her, but at one point, as I hung on the strap to keep my balance, I started tracking some object outside the bus; an interesting car or something. I can't even remember what it was, because as my line of sight moved to my left and down, I looked right at her, and stopped. She was smiling to herself, and must have caught the motion of my head, and looked up... and I held her gaze, not looking away, keeping my face neutral, no smile, no frown.
She smiled wider and glanced down, then back up, only her left eye showing, the other hidden under the curtain of her black hair.
I felt a warm flush start underneath my scarf and start to work its way up into my face. But I held her gaze. I smiled a little bit; I couldn't help it. That was one of the sexiest looks I'd been given in a while. I smiled simply to acknowledge the compliment and waited for her to look away again, which she did.
The bus ride is only 20 minutes long overall, from when I board to my stop, so the next few moments couldn't have been more than a five minutes at the most, but it seemed so much longer. I returned to not looking at her. Not out of embarassment; simply out of the urge to not spoil the moment previously. OK, OK, I kind of chickened out a bit. I was thrown, I'll admit it.
But as the bus rolled down the boulevard, swaying back and forth, her leg swung back and forth, too, and her pointed white-leather-encased toe poked me in the ankle. It drew my attention back to her, and I glanced at her again. Her whole face smiled; but it was subtle. She whispered "sorry" and looked anything but.
I gave her a mock-stern look and said, "You have to watch those shoes."
She looked at them again, and playfully kicked at me. "I know!"
"You might hurt someone." Someone else, I thought, dammit, why didn't I say that? But years of practice let me keep my face neutral, with just a hint of smirk.
"I'll be more careful."
But then every time the bus swayed, her toe brushed my pants leg again. I would give her a stern sideways look, and she would softly giggle.
At the first major stop downtown, the bus cleared out, and I had a choice of a seat next to her, and one across the aisle from her. I chose the one across the aisle from her, facing her. I maintained eye contact, just to continue to see her smile and her eyes, almost lit from within. I wondered about getting a phone number...
The bus stopped again, and she stood, joining the line of people deboarding, and I finally saw a clear view of her left hand, finally unhidden, and the plain gold band around her ring finger, an obvious wedding ring.
...damn.
But it was fun while it lasted.
Monday, January 24, 2005
Well, Smacky's got some kind of skin infection. The doctor gave him a shot of cortisone, another treatment of flea-be-gone (I forget which brand this time, but a different one from before) and I have to administer medicine, twice daily, until it's gone. I bring Smacky back next Wednesday for his "fixing", since the doctor didn't want to risk it while the poor cat's, y'know, ailin'.
Argh. Of course I will do what's necessary for Smacky. It's just annoying to have to reschedule things around again to transport Smacky back and forth to the vet (especially since I don't own a car and want to cut back on the FlexCar for a while), as well as the cost of multiple visits to the vet. It's not a lot of money, it's just... well... dammit, I had to dip into my iPod Shuffle money to pay for this visit.
If that's not love I don't know what is.
What I'm reading lately:
"All The President's Men" by Carl Bernstein and Bob Woodward.
Yeah, the book about the Watergate break-in and all that that entailed.
Because everything old is new again...
After that: "It Can't Happen Here" by Sinclair Lewis. Just a silly little story about the (fictional (at the time)) rise of fascism in America. It was actually written in the 1930s, before Hitler's agenda and atrocities became well-known. Should be entertaining...
Sunday, January 23, 2005
Oh, and by the way,
...she's so Hansel right now. Rowr
(That's one of the iPod Shuffle models from Apple's website)
OK, I called the Apple Store in Washington Square today, the actual retail location, not the online store, and asked them if they've received any iPod Shuffles from Apple yet. They were supposed to have shipped out on Saturday. I'd been reading reports on the internets that some stores had gotten some in and promptly sold out. I didn't expect the store to have any in stock, I just wanted to know if they were arriving now.
The salesman who answered the phone said, yes, they'd got them in and sold them out almost immediately. He didn't remember how many they got, he just said, "a LOT" and he seemed pretty impressed with it all.
(As a side note, they also got some of the Mac Minis in, and sold most of them; he said they had some of the lower-end model in stock. When I get one, I'm getting the one with the SuperDrive DVD-burning monster, so that was less important to me.)
I did, however, forget to ask him if they'd gotten both the 512 MB and 1 GB models in. I'm 87.73% sure I'm getting the 1 GB model, just 'cause it's only $49 more for double the space. I've checked my favorite playlists, and they're all more than a gig, though, so I'll still have to cut down what I listen to.
So... the online Apple Store is showing a 4- to 6-week shipping time for orders placed today for the iPod Shuffle. On the other hand, how long will I have to wait for the demand to die down at the retail locations before I can walk in and pick one up... without having to camp out at the door?
Decisions... decisions... I'd prefer to have my "Must! Have! One! NOW!" impulse satisfied quickly, by plunking down the benjamins and walking away with one in my hot grasp... but there's also something to be said for not having to stalk the poor Apple retail salesfolk until I can get one.
Still not sure which path to take... but the pressure of consumerism, combined with the nice weather and my new expectation of being able to run with music, will probably force my hand into ordering one online this week. We'll see if I can hold out longer than that.
But signs, as they say, don't look good.
OH! And, get this: my old iBook has the old, slow, USB, not the super-fast USB 2.0 that the iPod Shuffle uses. So, when I get it, it's going to take frickin' for-ever to fill it up. So, until I get that Mac Mini, I'm not going to be changing the playlist on my Shuffle very often. Do you see just how insidious Apple and Steve Jobs are? It's like they're forcing me to upgrade!
Curse you, Steve Jobs!!
I'd make a comment about Apple owning my soul, but I don't believe I have one in the first place, so, y'know, it's all good.
Saturday, January 22, 2005
Went running yesterday after work. The weather was warm for late January. Practically spring-like, again. Which is strange after the freezing rain of last weekend. Kind of almost feels like, oh, maybe there's something out of whack with the world... or the weather... or... y'know.
Anyway, I did the 2.5 miles of the Esplanade, and kept a slow pace. Stopped and walked a couple of times, but tried to do that for no more than 20-30 steps before I got myself running again. My legs were sore last night, and are a bit tight today, but not too bad.
I tried, I tried, oh, how I tried not to keep track of time. But, in the end, I did, although I'm not going to post it here because if I don't, then eventually I'll forget it and that's almost as good as not keeping track in the first place, right? But I was slow.
Strange to think that I'm about at the same place, both weight-wise and running-wise, where I am last year at this time. Maybe a bit better, with a bit more stamina, but not that much improved. Being too hard on myself? OK, yeah, I am. You wanna make something of it? Didn't think so... Anyway, if I'm marginally better than I was last year, even considering how well I did during the year, then maybe I'll finish this year even stronger. That's my plan. Did I mention in previous posts somewhere that I want to run a half-marathon this year? Yes, I believe I did.
I do have to keep track of my "exercise-induced bronchial spasms" (Nurse Cindy wanted to avoid giving me a diagnosis of "asthma") over the next couple of weeks, and if it flares up again, I'll probably have to retain a prescription for albuterol or something similar. Bummer. But, hey, I have friends who use it, and some of them are actual athletes, so I should be OK. I just worry that I'll internalize it and... oh, nevermind.
I've got some thoughts on friendship that I'll post later. Tonight or sometime tomorrow, depending on how the evening goes.
Friday Night Cat Blogging!
...now with more Saturday!
...and here's some more!
Friday, January 21, 2005
I was a bad political activist.
I was more concerned yesterday with my and my kittens' personal health than exercising my free speech rights in protesting the current presidential administrations' lack of ethics and accountability.
My apologies.
The good news is that I'm in pretty good health. Smacky, however, has been scratching himself horribly and has scabs on both of his shoulders. Apparently the fleas haven't been quite as under control as I thought. Poor thing. I guess the one application of the flea stuff wasn't enough. Or (this is my worry) he's having some kind of reaction to the flea stuff... or he's got some horrible cancer and is dying. Yeah, I'm worried and probably over-worrying. Remember, people, thinking too much is a bad thing. So I'm taking Smacky in on Monday (the earliest appointment I could get) to have him checked out.
I've felt so guilty that I've been letting him sleep in my bed again. At least until he starts attacking my toes at 1:27 AM and waking me up, and pissing me off, at which point the guilt turns into sleepy anger and I kick him out of the bedroorm.
Of course, the guilt returns when I wake up and open the door to find he has been sleeping against my door, and looks up at me and scratches himself and makes these piteous cries.
Is this what being a parent is like? Lurching from impatience and anger... to fear and guilt? Not sure I like it... But I will do whatever I can to make sure Smacky is OK.
I just love dealing with gianormous corporations.
Well, technically, I don't deal with the corporations. Despite the fact that corporations have legal status as persons (psychotic persons, but persons nonetheless), what I, like the rest of y'all, deal with is the paid minions of the corporations.
I've been in the process of paying off my credit cards, and I had some questions about one in particular. It was one of the earliest cards I got, several years ago, when I realized that my years of not having credit had actually put me at a disadvantage. So, because a person with no credit history is worse off than someone with a bad credit history (take my word for this one), the interest rate and annual fee were fairly large and I wanted to negotiate with them to reduce both of those items.
My current balance is just $8.06, which is the interest accrued on last month's balance, which I had just paid off. So, I had a simple question, to wit: since there's a "grace period" of 25 days on new purchases before a finance charge begins accruing, does that grace period also apply to a balance that is entirely finance charge?
Basically, when is the "grace period" observed if we're not talking about "purchases"? I could read in the contract that there is no grace period on things like cash advances or balance transfers, but it never specifically mentioned, y'know, finance charge.
So, time to contact the minions.
Since this bank has online banking, and by the time the question occurred to me it was after business hours, I decided to shoot them an email. Seemed simple enough. I made two attempts. So far I've received two responses. Here they are, edited slightly to remove all remaining accountability:
Response #1
From "Corporate Bank Customer Confuser"
Subject Re: Billing Questions (KMM19842426V5662L0KM)
Date Thu, January 20, 2005 3:08 am
To "Brian Moon"
Dear Brian Moon,
Thank you for your inquiry dated 1/19/2005.
Calculating when your payment is due each month is fairly simple. Your account billing cycle closes on or around the 19th of each month. Household Bank allows at least 20 days from the end of your previous billing cycle for you to make your payment due without penalty. Your current due date will be approximately 02/13/2005.
You are important to us and we appreciate your business.
Sincerely,
EmailMonkey
Corporate Bank Customer Confuser
Response #2
From "Corporate Bank Customer Confuser"
Subject Re: Billing Questions (KMM19842431V5687L0KM)
Date Fri, January 21, 2005 3:08 am
To "Brian Moon"
Dear Brian Moon,
We understand your concern regarding this matter.
Please be advised, finance charges on purchases will be assessed using the Average Daily Balance method during any billing period in which the previously billed balance was not paid in full by the due date. To obtain the average daily balance, take the beginning balance on your account each day, add any new purchases, previous days periodic finance charges, late charges, overlimit fees, and other administrative charges, subtracting any payments and credits. All of the daily balances for the billing cycle are then added together and divided by the total number of days in the billing cycle to obtain the Average Daily Balance. The Average Daily Balance is used in conjunction with your annual percentage rate to determine the monthly finance charge.
You are important to us and we appreciate your business.
Sincerely,
Corporo-Droid
Corporate Bank Customer Confuser
Now, read those carefully. The information in them is correct information. The English is proper and grammatically correct (OK, one typo that I see but it's not a big deal).
But do they ever actually answer my question?
Ummm... no.
Does anyone think that they actually, y'know, comprehended the question in question?
Ummm... probably not.
*sigh*
Thursday, January 20, 2005
As some kind of karmic payment (that I don't really believe in) for my inadvertently linking a Blues Traveler song yesterday to some spam- and spyware-infested site, today I couldn't stop hearing Blues Traveler songs wherever I went. In the mall, in the restaurant where I had lunch, in the doctor's office waiting for the nurse to come in... Sometimes the actual songs, twice a bastardized Muzak version denuded of all percussion and depth and stripped of lyrics.
So eventually I gave in, pulled out the iPod, and dialed up some more Blues Traveler. Might as well seep in it if karma is going to club me over the head with it.
If you follow Geeks Against Bush, the political blog that I also contribute to, you are probably aware that my friends Caleb and Gus are in Washington D.C. today, joining in the counter-inaugural events taking place today.
I got an email and a text from Caleb during the night telling his friends that he made it there safe. I haven't yet hit any news sites so I don't know what has been happening as I write this. I'll do that as soon as I publish this post.
I save my political opinions (mostly) for GAB, but here I just want to say that I hope Caleb and Gus are effective in voicing their opinion, and also hope that they return home safe.
Freedom isn't free, you know.
Wednesday, January 19, 2005
Update:
My previous post originally contained a link to a lyrics website. I found the site through a quick Google search and it seemed inoffensive enough.
However, I have been informed by one of the six or seven readers of my site that the link led to a bunch of nasty spyware-installing and popup-producing windows.
Since I use a Mac as my primary machine, and use Firefox when I'm forced to use a Windows machine, I didn't even notice that my browser had blocked a bunch of nasty probably-virus-installing-but-definitely-deserving-of-hyphentation malware from ever appearing.
I tested the link by loading it up in Insecure Exploiter (a.k.a. Internet Explorer), and, sure enough, managed to get infected with lots of stuff that my virus scanning software didn't like.
So I have changed the link in the original post to Blues Traveler's official lyrics page. I would have linked there originally but this morning the Blues Traveler site was tremendously sloooooooooooow and I had better things to surf for.
My apologies to the other readers of my site who are stuck using insecure operating systems and haven't seen the light. My sincere apologies. I'll be more careful next time. Probably. But if I'm not, it's not my fault.
Last night... I dreamed.
Tuesday, January 18, 2005
Oops. I accidentally went to the gym and fell onto a treadmill and ran 2 miles before I could stop myself.
Even though, technically, I was supposed to wait until after my follow-up visit with Nurse Cindy on Thursday.
I think I did pretty well, waiting this long. I've done a lot of walking in the past two weeks, though, and went back to taking the stairs. And even so, I could, when I sat down and stopped moving and was forced to feel this body I was living in, I could feel the lack of running just like it was a cold compress on me. Or maybe a hot damp blanket. Something constricting, at any rate. And smothering. Like any attention from your mom would be when you were thirteen. Wait... that's not a lack of something, is it?
Oh, hell, you know what I mean.
My run tonight was good, even though I kept a fairly slow pace. I didn't want to kill myself or anything. And I also specifically didn't keep track of the time. Just wanted to move and run and feel fast again. My breathing afterward was fine, too, so hopefully that almost-like-asthma-but-not-really thing was temporary. Getting the fleas under control on Smacky helped a tonne, I think, too. And, sadly, I no longer let him sleep in my bed. Well, sometimes. But not on nights before I plan to run. Mostly.
The weather's been strange. We had freezing rain this weekend, but today it was in the 60s and almost spring-like. Crazy (only one 'a'-crazy, though).
I need to archive my 2004 trophy page and my running log, and set one up for this year. For the record, I participated in 8 official races last year, six 5K runs and two 10Ks. Not bad for a first year runner. I look forward to this coming season to see how much I can improve.
There's so much in this post that I should link to but damn if I'm not too tired. Check back Wednesday and I might have come back and updated with links 'n' stuff. But don't hold me to it. 'Cause I'm like the wind, baby.
Monday, January 17, 2005
If you love cats, then you have to realize that cats, not so secretly, really do hate you.
The pictures on the above-linked site prove it. Honestly.
I'm sure Smacky loves me, though... I'm sure of it.
I'm tired of carrying around a thick wallet.
Mind you, I wouldn't mind so much if the wallet was busting open with twenty-, fifty-, and hundred-dollar bills. Sadly, that's not the case. Instead it's full of credit cards that, more often than not, are maxed out, multiplying "customer appreciation cards" of the sort where you collect stamps or punches in order to earn a freebie, and various other "membership" cards that I use from time to time for discounts or just basic access. Add on top of that all the receipts from debit card transactions and ATM uses, and my wallet bulges like some bulge-y thing.
I'm sure sitting on that thing is killing my back and neck. Sure of it.
This weekend I adopted a solution. I'm carrying two wallets now.
In the first wallet I put just the bare minimum; my debit card, my bus pass, my FlexCar card, my driver's license, and most of the "customer appreciation cards". Much much thinner that way. Oh, and any cash I may be carrying, although thanks to my debit card (and the fact that I earn miles on Alaska Airlines for using my debit card) I rarely carry any cash these days. That's thin enough to sit on, although I still tend to put it in a front pocket out of habit.
Into the other wallet goes everything else. And that wallet goes in my jacket, or my backpack if I'm carrying that. And if I forget it? Not a big deal; I can get by with the primary wallet most of the time.
I'll try it for a while and see how it goes.
Word of the day:
Ennui.
*sigh*
...which explains the lack of posts, even though I've had a three-day weekend all to myself.
Friday, January 14, 2005
Friday Night Cat Blogging
...and here's some more...
Almost got hit with a car tonight. I was crossing 12th at West Burnside, heading east. The light was with me, but an older couple in some SUV wasn't looking both ways as the driver creeped out into Burnside; he was only looking east, waiting for the traffic to clear so he could shoot out into the lane. He was in a hurry, dammit, his life was important or something. He had a wife with him that had to... be... somewhere, or something. I stepped out cautiously, looking directly at the driver, figuring he'd have to look where he was going instead of to his left eventually, like, maybe, a couple of seconds after he started up Burnside.
Which would have been a couple of seconds too late. Too late for me, at any rate.
I was directly in front of the SUV (it was silver; people who drive silver cars are weird), still waiting for the driver to look at me. He was still intent on watching the traffic, waiting for it to clear. It was dark. I was wearing my black leather jacket (too cold for this weather, made a bad choice this morning) and a black hat, a black-and-gray scarf my friend Rachael knitted for me. And another car was waiting for the pedestrians in front of me to finish crossing and was likewise creeping from Burnside onto 12th. It caught my eye for a moment, the headlights looked like a Mini Cooper, I was distracted for just a moment, and I don't think the driver of the Cooper saw me, either--
--And at that moment the driver of the SUV decided that the traffic was clear, since the Cooper was blocking the cars behind him. So the SUV surged forward.
And into me. It actually made contact with me, the bumper touching my legs and pushing me back, my hands slapping down on the hood, my torso twisting to my left and taking a half-step backward to get away from the silver tank heading my way. It had moved maybe a half-foot, six inches before it surged to a stop, gas-brake, that quickly.
The driver looked at me, I glared at him from under the brim of my black hat. I shook my finger at him, and shouted "You need to watch where you're going!" and continued through the intersection, and at that moment the white-man-says-walk changed to the flashing-orange-hand, and the Mini Cooper stopped so its headlights picked me out like spotlights. My heart was beating and my face warm with embarrassment or something like it (which makes no sense; why would I be embarrassed?) and a guy on the opposite corner, the safe corner, up on the safe sidewalk was smiling at me.
It felt, after the fact, like a close call. Could have turned out differently. Didn't, though. Still here. Yay.
Thursday, January 13, 2005
I've got to stop assuming that random people who piss me off (not using their turn signals, for instance, or stepping in front of me in line, stuff like that) voted for President Bush.
I'm sure most of them are, but probably not every one.
More Apple news:
Apple posted its best quarter results EVAR on Wednesday.
Net profit $295 million, on revenues of $3.49 billion. More than a million Macs sold last quarter -- and 4.85 million iPods!
The bestbestbest part is that the good news pushed Apple's stock up over $72 per share in after-hours trading. Which makes the one share of Apple stock I purchased several years ago at $15.50 seem like an actual wise investment. Yay, me!
Wednesday, January 12, 2005
I do some side work as a computer technician/consultant. But lately, with the massive proliferation of spyware and other malware for Windows, I've been turning down work, work for which I could be paid pretty well on an hourly basis but a fight that is, essentially, unwinnable. The spyware and adware is so malignant that it can infect a computer almost faster than it can be patched... so I can spend hours on a PC, trying to clean it off, only to have it remain infected.
It looks bad, even though I'm using all the skills I've learned over the years, to have the customer's PC still get pop-up ads and have it's home page set to porn. Lately when I'm asked, I give a couple of pointers on programs that will do a decent job of removing the spyware, and then tell them that Windows is rapidly becoming unusable because of spyware.
But now... because the Mac mini is so damned cheap... I've got a new recommendation.
Just buy a Mac if you want to surf in peace.
If you want to deal with Windows... then you'll need to learn how to remove spyware on a regular basis.
Macs -- easy to use, and now just as cheap (cheaper, even, if you consider all the excellent software it comes with)than a Dell. And a hell of a lot more stable and secure.
Yay, Apple! They're gonna sell a freakin' metric tonne of these...
Tuesday, January 11, 2005
*sigh*
I want one of each:
CURSE YOU, STEVE JOBS!!!
Edit: Made each picture link to Apple's page about them.
OK, nevermind on the previous post.
You can turn "shuffle" off:
Mine!
Arrrgh!!
But I hate "shuffle" for my music!
Why, Jobs? Why?!
I have really been put off by this "no running" thing, even though my last run was a week ago yesterday.
So, last night, it was clear (but cold) outside, and there was still some actual sunshine going on (yay! days are getting longer!) so I decided to walk home from work. Took the Springwater Corridor. I was dressed plenty warm, and I had my iPod to keep me company, which chose for the occassion White Stripes "White Blood Cells", AC/DC "Highway to Hell", and Harvey Danger's new EP "Sometimes You Have To Work On Christmas (Sometimes)".
My legs are a bit sore this morning, but overall I feel better having gotten at least some exercise in. I might even go to the gym and lift... and try not to accidentally fall on the treadmill for a mile or two.
I think the reason Smacky's been so feisty lately is due to clearing up his flea problem. As the fleas bug him less, he's got more energy available to, you know, bite the hell out of me. Plus he's getting near to cat puberty.
Today's the day that Steve Jobs will finally announce whatever coolio stuff Apple has been working on lately. Rumors point to a Flash-based iPod, a new office suite to counter MS Office, and a sub-$500 headless iMac. Not that I follow the rumors, of course. But in this case, the rumors are probably true because Apple is suing people who speculate about Flash-based iPods, Apple-branded office suites, and sub-$500 headless iMacs. But, in reaction to the leaks, Steve has shut down the streaming video feed of his keynote speech, banned journalists from reporting live from the keynote, and forced all Mac users to speak only Swahili during the keynote. So don't expect me to be coherent between, say, 9 AM and 11 AM today. Just sayin'. (I'll be mighty pissed if I can still talk English during that time. That would be a huge snub, wouldn't it?)
Ah, well, off to work. Ciao, babies.
Monday, January 10, 2005
How is it that I still have discussions (OK, OK, arguments) in my head with people who are long gone from my life?
Sunday, January 09, 2005
Didn't see Dr. Strangelove. Wanted to see the 2:45 PM showing but couldn't make it in time. Damn bus system. OK, I stopped for lunch but still should have had plenty of time to make it clear across town for the movie.
Smacky's still bite-y and needing-attention-y. Not sure what's up with him.
Another weekend over. Bleah.
Caleb and I were going to see Dr. Strangelove today, but apparently he's busy falling in Love with Pure Knowledge. I don't think Caleb sees the irony, but I do.
Smacky is being very bite-y today and I don't know why. He climbs up on my shoulders and bites my hair and ears. Not fun. Especially not fun when I'm trying to get him off of me and he digs in with his claws while continuing to bite me. At first I thought he was grooming me (awwwwwwww...) but then I realized that grooming would involve less biting and more licking. No, he was up to something else.
So... I think I'm still going to go see the Dr., just because it's horribly funny (or funnily horrible?) and it's been years since I've seen it (and never on the big screen). Also I can get away from my bite-y cat, who is currently perched on my left shoulder purring and watching me type.
Saturday, January 08, 2005
Did you know that it can take 5 minutes or more for my blog to load if you're on dial-up? Yeah, bad, I know. If any of you are out there reading it after waiting that long, I probably owe you booze or something. I like the way it looks but a) my page doesn't validate as CSS-anything, and b) it's super-resource-intensive, and c) it really only looks good in the browsers I use, which means that the majority browser (Internets Exploder from MS) wasn't even considered when I designed it. So, I need to come up with something new. And I've kinda been putting it off, since I haven't been, y'know, inspired.
However, I'm happy to announce that I'm much closer to a final design for Lunar Obverse v2.0. I worked on a mock-up tonight, just sketching something out and getting the colors down. And I'm not even sure these are the final colors and right now none of the elements are in place but, what the hell, I'm posting a tiny scaled-down version of it just to show everyone that I'm working on it:
click on image for larger version; opens in new window
See, the image at the top will be an actual picture (grabbed from NASA, since all that stuff is public domain for taxpayers) -- the grey area will be the surface of the moon and the blue blob is the Earth. The tiny little bar underneath that will be the navigation menu. The wide left-hand column will be the main content, my posts; the right-hand column will have the extra stuff, like the Picture of the Week, the archive links, and maybe a poll someday or something.
I haven't decided if the sections will all be boxed in like that. I mainly did that to show myself where they'd go.
I'll work on it some more tomorrow and when I'm done, I'll use it to throw together some HTML/CSS and then mock up a couple of posts, 'cause I still have to decide what color text to use for all the elements. I still like light text on a dark background but might flip that and just have dark borders around everything. Decisions, decisions... and I'm not a graphic designer, dammit, I'm a writer and a geek. So comments are welcome. But hold off until I've got more of the total design filled in.
Then I'll post a link to it, hopefully later next week, and let people comment on it.
One thing I don't have now is an "About Me" page. But the whole damn blog is about me, so why would I be redundant?
Went up to Urban Fauna in NW Portland today. I didn't spend a lot of time there, just did boy-shopping (I went in, found what I was looking for, wandered for exactly 2 minutes, paid for the item, left).
I was downtown anyway for my eye doctor appointment, and I've got a project I'm going to attempt now that Smacky is big enough.
I'm going to leash train him.
I want to be able to take him on short runs with me (you know, after I can start running again. *sigh*). Or at least go for walks, or be able to safely restrain him if I ever take him visiting with me.
Call me craaaaazy, but I think Smacky is smart enough to train. I've done a good job of training him out of being so bite-y, and have gotten good results with the "ride on Brian's shoulders" trick (although it's painful when I'm only wearing a light t-shirt or no shirt, but I think teaching a cat tact and discretion might take a lot longer than I've probably got patience for).
I will, of course, post pictures of Smacky in his stylish new purple harness. Maybe for next Friday's cat blogging.
By the way: I totally stole "Friday Night Cat Blogging" from Atrios, a.k.a. Duncan Black.
Friday, January 07, 2005
Friday night cat blogging:
...here's some more.
Thursday, January 06, 2005
Oh, right, the two helpful appointments, mentioned below?
One, I took Smacky in for his first exam and shots. He's healthy and well-behaved... except for the fleas. But we're taking care of those.
And, two, I saw a doctor for the coughing and nasal drip I've been having. Yeah... it's allergies. Probably Smacky. We'll see if they get better after I start my inhaler. Yeah... inhaler. Dammit. I asked the doctor if I could start running again (I've stopped in the last week because of the coughing) and she said that I should stop until I come back in for the follow-up.
"But... do you know about runner's guilt?" I whined. "I didn't believe people when they told me about it, but... damn... can't I run just a little bit?"
She gave me a sympathetic look. "I'm a runner, too, believe me, I know. You'll be so much faster and better after the treatment, it will be like night and day." Damn, she did know about runner's guilt. So with that encouragement, I'll try really really hard not to run for... two... whole... weeeeeeeeeeeeeks. Dammit.
Had three appointments today with various professionals. One adversarial, two helpful.
The adversarial one was related to the trial back in November where I was called as a witness. You may recall that I thought I might have been harassed by the county lawyers. Today I was finally able (along with another coworker) to present my claim to them and see how they react. They, um, didn't like it much. In fact they used the Nuremberg defense: "We were only doing our job." I know, I know, it's probably an unfair comparison, but I still believe that they put their desires to defend themselves and their schemes above their responsibility to their fellow employees and the rights of said employees (like, for example, me).
Basically: I didn't want to talk to the lawyers for the defense, and they intimidated me into it relentlessly and by getting more managers involved.
Which leads to the scene in the meeting today where the head lawyer pages through a copy of my email exchange with her lieutenant and dismisses it as, "Frankly, I thought that you were a little less than clear in your communication."
I'm pretty sure my eyes bugged out. "I was," I said, enunciating each word separately, "less than clear?"
She may have snorted derisively. She did glance at me as if she thought my question was so far off the topic, it didn't even merit a response.
I said, "I used the phrase 'I decline to meet with you.' How unclear can that be?"
She pretended I was speaking Japanese or something and continued not responding.
Incredulously, I continued. "I used that phrase five times!"
At which point she changed the subject.
When it became clear that we were not going to agree, the HR fluffer in attendance asked me what I had hoped to achieve.
I replied, "I wanted to challenge management on this issue and bring it to their attention."
He smirked, and understated, "Well, I think you did that."
We'll see what happens. Probably nothing; county management seems constitutionally incapable of self-reflection and self-correction. They're, y'know, always right and everything they do is on the side of the angels.
I'm taking Smacky in for his shots (yeah, yeah, finally) so this week I thought I'd introduce him to his carrier. I didn't want him to freak out when I put him in it or associate it only with trips to the vet.
Probably optimistic, but there you go.
Anyway, so the night before last I left it out in the living room so he could sniff it and get comfortable around it. Then last night I put some cat treats in there for him to find, and I praised him and petted him whenever he went near it...
Well, my treatment worked very well, because he spent the night in it. I woke up this morning when I looked in the living room, in the darkness I could see his eyes glowing inside the little box...
I've bought him a cat bed, and a little cat condo, you know, one of those carpeted things that are a couple of stories high with cubby holes... but where does he like to sleep? On top of the water heater (sure, makes sense, it's warm) and inside his cat carrier (because it might have treats inside)... I think I'm encouraging the wrong behaviors.
At least he's way less bite-y now, though.
Best. Article. EVAR:
Kate Beckinsale forced to give away masturbating rabbit.
From the article:
"I think his own frustrated sexuality just consumed him in a horrid and chilling way.Can you seriously blame the rabbit, though?
"I don't think he liked being in a cage and wouldn't stop masturbating and humping his food bowl. I was sick of inventing different explanations of what that was.
"Also, he was boring and, other than masturbate, he didn't do anything."
He lived with Kate Beckinsale, for ghod's sake!
Monday, January 03, 2005
While I was cleaning tonight, I found something tiny and white and curved. Looked like a toenail clipping, but it was too white and too thick. Then I thought it might be one of Smacky's claws -- and it looked bloody. Did he tear one out... um... somehow?
But what it really looks like is a tooth. A tooth! I mean, baby humans lose their teeth, but it never occurred to me that a kitten would, too.
I grabbed Smacky and took him into the bathroom (better light in there) and pried open his jaw and it looked like he had all the normal complement of teeth in all the expected spots.
How weird. No, it's probably normal. Probably is weirder that I want to save it as a keepsake, huh?
No, wait, don't answer that.
Saturday, January 01, 2005
Grilled/toasted sandwich update:
I finally tried one of the panini sandwiches from Big Town Hero.
Not bad.
Now that my iPod is "like-new" again, I did some playlist maintenance on it. I don't like manually selecting albums to listen to most of the time. I want it to just serve up, semi-randomly, my favorites, with some oddities mixed in here and there. And, thanks to Apple's Smart Playlists, that is in fact possible. But only if the music collection is suitably organized.
Smart Playlists can collect songs based on almost anything, and as many different criteria as there are, well, criteria for organizing music. Genre, Artist, words in the title or album, words not in the title or album, my rating of the song, the type of file, the date it was last played, the number of times it's been played... all that and more.
Since I prefer to listen to full CDs, in the order they were recorded (I. Hate. Shuffle.) first I set up a playlist of all my non-album songs (individual downloads from back in the day before I was so enlightened to only listen to full CDs, mostly).
Then I set up a playlist for all my 2- and 3-star rated songs, and excluded anything that was on the "non-album" playlist.
Then I set up a playlist for all my 4- and 5-star rated songs, with the same exclusion.
Finally I made a smart playlist combining the two above playlists.
Seems like a lot of work? It's not, really. Took me about 5 minutes (since I've already compulsively rated and tagged all my songs -- yeah, organization is a bitch, which is why it's a good habit to have).
At any rate, here are the 5 CDs I've listened to so far today:
- Beck, "Sea Change"
- Radiohead, "My Iron Lung" (EP)
- Radiohead, "Hail To The Thief"
- Modest Mouse, "Good News for People Who Love Bad News"
- They Might Be Giants, "Flood"
I'm very sad.
It seems apparent now that I have been having an allergic reaction to Smacky. It may be something else, possibly my new apartment, but since the time between moving in to my new place and getting Smacky was only a few months, it's hard to tell which may be the cause.
The symptoms have been a persistent nasal drip, congestion in the chest and throat, itchy eyes and throat... all the typical symptoms. The symptoms have been affecting my regular exercise and running. I haven't been able to run as fast or as far while being unable to breathe. Strange, huh? (Sarcasm alert)
At first I thought it was a cold but it hasn't gone away, and I notice it far more when I'm at home and particularly around Smacky.
I don't recall ever having a reaction to cats like I've been having, though. I've been avoiding thinking about it, because I do not want to have to give Smacky up. But in researching it (thank you, InterWeb!) I've discovered that I chose exactly the wrong kind of cat -- turns out male, dark-colored, shorthair cats produce the strongest allergic reaction.
Well, that's not entirely true -- unaltered males produce the least amount of allergic reactions. So I'm going to finally get Smacky neutered. He's not going to like it, but it's necessary. Even if I give Smacky away, I'm going to get him neutered. Shelters won't take him otherwise. But hopefully having him altered will decrease my reaction to him to the point where I can keep him.
Other things I'll look into are changing the cat litter I'm using. I do notice a strong reaction around his litterbox. I'll see if I can find another type.
The worst part is, I now need to clean my apartment waaaaaaaaaaay more often than I'm used to! That sucks. But I suppose it's a benefit, too. Bleah.
Other online suggestions I've found are replacing carpets with wooden flooring and using air filters. I'll think about getting a filter for the bedroom. I have started keeping Smacky out of the bedroom, which is also sad.
I have been bathing him regularly but I understand there are specific shampoos for reducing the amount of allergens cats produce; I'll try one of those, too.
If anyone has any tips, post 'em on this comment.
